King me.

I am colorblind, and since fucking when can you play piano? You pretentious ball sucker. Any day mother fucker. Okay so I'm sorry that I haven't updated in 5 whole days omfb I know but this is why. I am moving to florida in a couple weeks and I had some stuff to do before I could make it happen. It's officially official. In a couple hours my mom is going to walk downstairs, and wake me up. I'm going to get a quick shower, get dressed and ready, drive 7.2 miles for coffee and come back where my mom will be all ready and looking fresh. We will then look at the notes we took the night before open our cell phones and pretend we know what we're doing. We'll be on the phone most of the morning. ugh. Ps he's STILL FUCKING TEXTING ME. jesus. I told the boy, we're over. He just doesn't get it. So anyways we have to finish all this stuff up tmr before I can officially move, it's going to be a long day. I only have 3 weeks left and I wil be counting down the days 21 today :) it's coming up fast and I'm ready to run So let's go with me baby get ready to roll. I'll be on my way to florida very fucking soon. I don't know if I can go though. This is me speaking honestly. I don't know if I can live without my mom, fuck you if you think I'm a mama's boy. My mother and I share a very special bond that a lot of people don't understand you can even ask car car. We're the best of friends in a mom son kinda way, she's always there for me, and always has been. I don't know if I can just shove off without her, especially when she's in this situation that she's in. It's going to be tough and I don't know quite yet how to react to it. Atleast I'll have my brothers. At some point I do need to move on but I think I'm a little different from them in the aspect that it's completely different from when they originally moved out and the 42 times to follow. Another one I don't know about is carly. I'm afraid that if not now, never and if not now when? I'm so scared that this will be the end of us, and I need her more than she knows, she keeps my pistons pumping...if you know what I mean. She's the soothing in the soft and the chill about the frost, she's the sting before the breath and the strength to keep it in. I don't know if I can deal without her. Florida is the MOST BEAUTIFUL state you'll ever see, it's geriatric heaven and it's sand and sun all year round, I think the first year will be tough I just have to keep in mind that I'm only going to be alone for the first year. After that I'm sure things will change, I'm sure my mom will be joining me, and I hope carly can do it even sooner. I know my mom can't but...she will. I know she will. It's just scary because the people who I rely the most on now, won't be around forever. Neither will I. I don't want to leave this world I live in now, but I know deep inside if I don't I'll regret it. I also know that I am not going to waste the best years of my life. I want to party I want to go buck wild and I want to do whatever the fuck it is I want. I do have priorities though. I owe some people a lot. I have to do this all in good time or not do it at all. And the scariest thing about it is, I'm going to be....on my own.